I've learned so much about myself... about necessity... about love and priorities... about poop. (Let's be honest...I wipe it up every day so I feel like I know a lot!)
There's a few things that I've learned about 'mommyhood' (yes, we are going to make that a real word) that I've been meaning to share for a while. So...here we go:
- Makeup is a waste of time most days. Because who really cares what color your eye shadow is when you're scrubbing off the dried spit up on your face?? Right?
- I'd rather wear sweatpants and t-shirts for the rest of my life. I used to like to stare at my closet and pick out clothes that looked cute together. Now, I just stare at my closet...with an honest desire to try...and then I glance at my t-shirt drawer... I'm tellin' you, the t-shirts always win.
- Babies take a lot of time to get ready. I used to be early...everywhere. Now I'm five minutes late ...everywhere. At least I'm consistent right?
- Never in your life will you care so much about poop...the color of it; the texture of it; what time of day it came. You might even ask your close circle of friends to pray for for poop... Seriously, it's life people.
- I've learned a lot about quick math... like how to add up how many cents Madi "owes me" for each time I change her diaper and she immediately pees or poops into the new one the second it hits her fresh butt. Honestly...I swear she knows!
- There will always be another dirty bottle. As if constant dirty diapers didn't kill ya, no matter how many times you wander the house to gather all the dirty bottles, it never fails that when you finish washing them all, you'll find yet another one...under the rocker ...in the diaper bag ...in the car. They're everywhere!
- Babies are expensive. You can tell any parent this prior to bringing home their first baby. And then the reality of leaving one of your jobs and having to buy a lot of diapers and formula hits. Mmm... We've learned the beauty of penny pinching...literally to save a penny. Because you never know when you'll need an extra cent.
- The middle of the night is the most beautiful time of the day... said no one EVER! For all you moms who loved those 2 a.m. wake up calls, I'm so proud of you for being cheerful even at that insane time. Where were you when I needed you? Two a.m. is way to early to comprehend anything...let alone have to calculate bottle measurements and diaper logging. I tried to enjoy it...I really did. Lucky for me, Madi sleeps through the night now, so everyone in our household gladly enjoys our sleep.
- Germs are real. I always knew that. I always kind of cared. But now, just try to touch Madi's face or hands during flu season! You'll see mama bear come out. I don't try to sound mean, but unless you want to come soothe a baby all night, would you mind just not touching her? We'd rather stay healthy.
- Babies know how to fight their sleep... Why? I have not the darndest clue. But they do. And it usually is accompanied by high pitched screams that might break your ear drums.
- But eventually they give in. And then that baby's peaceful face is the only thing you want to look at the for the next hour.
- Nap time is beautiful. I love my play times with Madi. I love watching her smile and coo and giggle at me. But I also love nap times. Because it usually means it's 'mommy time' - whether that involves cleaning the house, working, napping myself, or just taking an hour to do something 'me' related.
- Your job as a mom literally never ends. It's possibly the busiest job ever. There's always laundry. There's always dirty bottles and trash to empty and bathrooms to clean...the list goes on.
Okay, all joking aside...being a mommy is a lot of work. I meant what I said in number 13. Sometimes I crawl in bed at night (way later than I should) and wonder what I did that day: Is my ear still ringing from that scream earlier? Did I ever clean up that spit up off the play mat? Shoot, I meant to empty the diaper genie tonight - that room is starting to smell. Or I start making my list for the next day: Hunt for bottles. Wash my t-shirts. Wash Madi's clothes while I'm at it. Pick up more formula. Sometimes those jobs feel monotonous. Sometimes they feel thankless or unnoticed. Sometimes they feel like I've lost a part of who I am in the busyness of the day.
But then I wake up in the morning to those precious little grunts (because more poop is likely on its way) and walk into my daughter's room. All I have to do is say "Good morning sunshine" and the biggest smile peels across that little one's face. That makes it all worth it. Or when she tucks her face into your neck and crashes because she's safe in your arms. That makes it all worth it. Or whenever she just stares into your eyes and coos at you because she knows you're her momma and you love her to pieces. That makes it all worth it.
This child has already taught me so much and she teaches me a little bit more about herself and myself every single day.
Being a mommy is the one of the heaviest jobs on the earth: Someone else's life and well being is constantly in your hands. But it's also one of the most rewarding.
So who cares if I live in my favorite t-shirt or am five minutes late to yet another doctor's appointment? I'm just doing my job the best that I can... and enjoying every poopy diaper along the way (someone remind me later that I said that, okay?).